How-to

Bart's How-to Guide – Episode 11

How to tip off who is going to be in the final three:  At the end of the penultimate episode, traditionally there has been taunting between the final three (or sometimes four) teams about who is going to win. Showing a beginning of episode sound bite that sounds appropriate for the taunting sequence, especially when the racers are wearing different clothes and are in a different location than the one at the start of the episode, is a pretty good sign that the team in question is going to make the final three. Eric and Danielle were this team. Eric said "It's been a long road and we didn't come this far, through all this crap, to lose." Which may be true at the beginning of the penultimate episode, but given the clues, we're already spoiled that they will not be eliminated......NEXT!
Speaking to someone using a Mirnish accent is not going to help you to communicate with them, but neither is speaking to them using a stereotypical local accent.

How to be wrong, and then be even more wrong:  Demonstrate one set of bad behavior, and then make a statement congratulating yourself for demonstrating the exact opposite behavior - when neither the behavior you espouse nor the behavior you demonstrate is correct. Mirna talks about using the local accent when communicating with folks on the race, right after she talks to a driver in Hong Kong using her patented Spanish/Italian/Condescension accent. Speaking to someone using a Mirnish accent is not going to help you to communicate with them, but neither is speaking to them using a stereotypical local accent. One of the characteristics of Hong Kong English is that the letter "r" is dropped at the end of words, or gets pronounced as a W or an L. But for Mirna to say "Dwiva, you made an E-wa", instead of "Driver, you made an error", would be very, very inappropriate. Mirna needs to focus on communicating clearly, instead of focusing on her accent. 

How to see B-52's:  So maybe you won't get a chance, like the teams did, to see and wash a B-52. But you are able to see them live. The B-52's, billed by their website as the World's Greatest Party Band, still perform thirty years after their first gig on Valentine's Day in 1977.  Perhaps best known for their 1988 single "Love Shack", the band is playing sixteen dates this summer, in places as diverse as Asheville, North Carolina's Biltmore Estate, the Montreaux Jazz Festival in Switzerland, Asser Levy Park in Brooklyn, and the Sandia Casino in Albuquerque, New Mexico - the site of a certain incident.

How to learn about the island of Guam: Don't watch this episode. Watch the fourth episode of this season. Since the tasks involved in this episode involved the military, viewers learned nothing about the island of Guam outside of the fact that the island has a US military presence. In episode 4, we learned that Guam was a stop on the route of Ferdinand Magellan, but we still have learned nothing about Guam. Neither about how the US took control of Guam during the Spanish-American war, nor about the Chamorro people who have lived on Guam since 2000 BCE and today are the majority population, nor about the Latte stones - which are traditional pillars made by the Chamorro people. This episode is perhaps the poorest of the season as far as educating viewers about life at the pit stop location.
So, Oswald and Danny will be helping each other out at the Gay retirement home? That’s a good thing.

How to enjoy senior living with folks like you: So, Oswald and Danny will be helping each other out at the Gay retirement home? That's a good thing. Compared to straight seniors, gay seniors are more likely to live alone, and less likely to have someone who can care for them should they become ill. It was only ten years ago that construction began on the first retirement community for gay and lesbian seniors - the Palms of Manasota in Palmetto, Florida.  Several other such facilities have been built or are being planned, such as the Rainbow Vision properties in Santa Fe and Palm Springs, which feature fitness centers bearing the name of tennis star Billie Jean King. As author Ramone Johnson writes, "Why spend an entire lifetime overcoming homophobia, only to end up in the care of a nursing home staff that has little or no experience with glbt care?" 

How to finish in fourth place for the second time on The Amazing Race:  Fail to live up to your potential. Danny and Oswald ran an excellent first portion of the race. But by this episode, after the bunch point at the Air Force, they were unable to outrace the other teams in either the Detour or the Roadblock tasks, or get to their locations before the other teams. For the second straight race, the team marked for elimination in the penultimate episode finished in fourth place in that episode before factoring in their penalty. While their post-race comments may dilute their fabulousness, Danny and Oswald have proven that they are worthy of the title "All-Stars".