Fashion Reports

Fashion Report - Episode Six

Daria: Iíd like to welcome back Swimmerboy, who had the original idea for this column, then had to put his attention on his real life. With Hildy on vacation this week, however, Swimmerboy has agreed to step in and share his thoughts about the most recent episode. So, Swimmerboy, do you have any general thoughts youíd like to share about the episodes you missed?

Swimmerboy: Thanks Daria! Iím anxious to comment on the warm weather clothing for this episode, so Iíll just leave the past in the past. But I MUST add my dislike to Philís fugly red sweater of last week. One of the ugliest things Iíve ever seen.
That frees us up to splash around in the shallow end of the pool.
Daria: I loved this episode! First of all, most of the racers played nice, so we didnít have the distraction of nasty attitudes coloring the visuals. That frees us up to splash around in the shallow end of the pool. I think I see Reichen and Chip there waiting for us. Mmmm, Reichen and Chip! Were they hot or what? Nice legs, nice stompers, nice chiseled features.

Swimmerboy: Oh goodness, yes! I am sitting in the shallow end of the pool and Iím NOT leaving. The past few episodes, my attraction to Reichen had been waning somewhat, but Thursday night it was brought back full throttle. Both boys were very casual, yet still impeccably stylish in tees and cargo shorts. Normally Iíd deduct points for wearing a white t-shirt, but Reichen pulled it off in that he filled it out and it looked like a plain white shirt, fitted very nicely, instead of a raggy undershirt (Iím looking at you, Jeff and David). Chip looked great in a dark grey t-shirt and khaki cargos. Both boys have lovely legs. Also? Iíve fallen head over heels for Chip. ShhhÖdonít tell anyone. Heís such a sweetie.

Daria: Chip is quite adorable Ė when heís not freaking out about lines. There wasnít anything this week Iíd like to put on the burn pile. Someone on TWOP mentioned a neon pink t-shirt, belonging to BuffJon, I believe. I didnít see anything that bright, though. Jon does make some weird clothing choices, but this week he stayed out of my line of fire. Philís white shirt was sort of meh, and the clowns looked like they didnít care that much, but everyone else was wearing pretty generic warm weather clothing.
The funny two-toned cap with multi-colored band around the brim. I mean, what was that? Put that in the pile.
Swimmerboy: I, too, had no problem with BuffJonís shirt. It was pretty much red on my screen, and combined with the khaki shorts, he looked pretty good to me. BuffJon has some nice legs himself, but Iíve got to ask what the hell was that hat he had on? The funny two-toned cap with multi-colored band around the brim. I mean, what was that? Put that in the pile. And while weíre there, Iíve got something else for it. The shorts of both Jeff and Al. I understand the baggy style basketball shorts are probably pretty comfortable, but only while playing basketball or some other such sport. It drives me crazy to see people wearing these out anywhere. These combined with the v-neck t-shirt made Jeff appear as if he were off to the Y to shoot some hoops. Not good, Jeff. Not good. Al was equally unimpressive in these shorts, but made it even worse by going with an open buttoned red shirt over a black tee. I donít even know where to start with that. Al? I love you man, but seriously, címon here.

Daria: As I said in the forums having seen the previews, I know that Millie takes some heat for her mole next week. Yet guess who was on one of the commercials during this week's TAR? Cindy Crawford! With her famously beautiful mole, which is about the same size as Millie's (maybe a tad smaller) and in about the same place. Would Kelly dare make fun of Cindy Crawford's mole? Of course not. She'd get all tongue-tied trying to suck up to Cindy Crawford. I also noticed that Millie has nicer arms than Kelly does. Millie's arms are thin but with good definition, while Kelly's are way too skinny. Given a choice, I'd take the mole and the nice arms over no mole and skeletal arms. The only thing I didnít like about Millieís appearance this week was her hair in her face at the Suds detour.

Swimmerboy: Yeah, Millieís hair is getting ratty. Time to put it up, babe, until you can do something decent with it at the next pit stop.
Thatís what weíve been missing thus far Ė stompers and great legs.
Daria: I would have liked a longer shot of the dancers in Bollywood. What little I saw was gloriously glittery! This weekís greeter was quite dignified, but he had a very welcoming smile. And speaking of minor characters, Team Who? has stompers! And great legs, too. Thatís what weíve been missing thus far Ė stompers and great legs.

Swimmerboy: Yes, Team Whoís physiques arenít too shabby, but per my above statements, they, or at least Jeff, need some serious style advice. Is it too late to submit them as the next candidates for Queer Eye For the Straight Guy (which I most emphatically will not be watching)?

Daria: My nominees for this weekís Pretty People award Ė for the team with the best combination of good looks, good nature, and good racing Ė are Reichen and Chip. As I said above, they were just hot. They also ran a good race, finishing second, and they were friendly and cooperative with the other teams. All in all, they were a joy to watch. I will definitely miss the previous winners, Monica and Sheree, by the way. They were classy, but they ran out of steam this week. As for runners up, Iím torn between Team Who?, with their first-place finish and their stompers, and Tian and Jaree. The models have been beautiful all along, but this is the first week theyíve bottled up the ugly attitudes and worked together. I want to recognize that, but I think I really do have to put them slightly behind Team Who?, despite Whoís t-shirt problems. Maybe Iím just stomper-starved and making up for lost time. What are your thoughts, Swimmerboy?

Swimmerboy: Definitely Reichen and Chip. And even though they were eliminated, I have to go with Team Supreme for runners up, followed by Tian and Jaree. I wasnít too fond of Tianís pinkish camo top and faded burgundy cargo pants, but they raced solidly this week and without any arguing, so they land in the top three.